is in full swing. I am only dialated a little more than 1 but not too much, which doesn't surprise me. Corban didn't dialate well either. I will go back to the doc in a week and if Asher has not made an appearance by then they will induce Friday. Which would be great, except that it is Eric's brother's birthday, Eric's birthday is 2 days later. But I really would like for him to come this weekend. The doc picked Friday because he is on call and I would love to have him deliver. I really do like my doc.
On the home front, we are fully moved in but not 100% situated. Eric has painted both Corban's and Asher's rooms. Aher's is a real light blue and will be decorated with green and monkey accents. Corban's is a little darker blue and will be decorated in fire trucks, he has a fire truck toddler bed. Their bathroom has not been painted yet but is monkeys and frogs.
I personally have been having a difficult struggle lately. I often miss church due to Corban's nap time and me just being plain tired on top of it, so often I take a nap with him. That, in part, is due to the move and just being preggers. I also have lost touch with what I once called close"friends." I am not sure that I have done anything to cause this but for whatever reason we no longer talk. I find myself feeling like the "rebound" relationship till something better comes along for the other person and then they are gone, only to have it happen over and over again. Then I have the "friend" who is too good or concerned about their "position" to actually be a friend, that I have never understood. I do really love my church family but it is so small it is hard to find someone I can really connect with. Since I am not a stay at home mom I have a hard time finding time to catch up with much of anyone because most of my free time is on the weekends and I know those are busy for everyone. I am thinking of doing away with my facebook, I just grow frustrated to see where my friends have made time to meet up with others, yet I didn't even get a phone call for a simple hello. Especially when my calls go unanswered or messages unresponded to. To be honest, it really does hurt my feelings. While I am quite the confrontational type for some reason I will not do it for myself. Don't get me wrong I am not perfect and I am sure I have NOT been the friend I need to be either I just get tired of trying. Why should I put any effort into it if the other person will not? I am just tired, frustrated and emotional and the preggers doesn't help any. I just had to get that off my chest. I feel better now. I am not looking for sympathy or pity/praying for you comments I just needed to vent. I think there are lots of other women out there that feel the same way though and for some reason we have to be strong and show no weakness. God has blessed my family above and beyond what I can ever imagine and I know He has not forgotten me...... I am just tired (mentally and physically) and frustrated and done, so to speak.
2 comments:
So that you don't feel alone on the home front: I feel the same way!!! All of my friends who were stay at home moms have moved on and are done with having children, work, etc. but I'm not done. It is as if our friendship suddenly quite just because our kids went to school, they went to work, and they dont stay home anymore. I want desperately to stay connected with people but having a baby and staying home pushes people away because our lives are "different" or "going in different directions." It is as if people think you have to be at the same point in life to be friends and that is not the case. I'm not going to pity you (; but I'm sorry you are going through a similar state. I would love to have coffee and have been trying to get together with various people for over a month now (they are all too busy). I know you work and are busy yourself, but if you have any evening available (after 6)before this baby is due (even weekdays) I'd be available to get together...I NEED girl time and would love to reconnect!
I can do after 6 on a night or since tomorrow is my last day at work if you wanted to get together Monday during the day sometime. I will not have Corban. I can come there if you like since you have lilbit or we can meet up!!!! So excited!!! Let me know :)
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